In The Reason for God, Tim Keller speaks of the danger of expecting all Christians to grow at the same rate. He makes a couple great observations as he explains what we often see as failings and hypocrisy in the body of Christ. The second paragraph is very applicable, however since it relies on the first, read them both.

“A central message of the Bible is that we can only have a relationship with God by sheer grace. Our moral efforts are too feeble and falsely motivated to ever merit salvation. Jesus, through his death and resurrection, has provided salvation for us, which we receive as a gift. All churches believe this in one form or another. Growth in character and change in behavior occur in a gradual process after a person becomes a Christian. The mistaken belief that a person must ‘clean up’ his or her own life in order to merit God’s presence is not Christianity. This means, though, that the church will be filled with immature and broken people who still have a long way to go emotionally, morally, and spiritually. As the saying has it: ‘The church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.’

… Now imagine that someone with a very broken past becomes a Christian and her character improves significantly over what is was. Nevertheless, she still may be less secure and self-disciplined than someone who is so well adjusted that she feels no particular need for religious affiliation at all. Suppose you meet both of these women the same week. Unless you know the starting points and life journeys of each woman, you could easily conclude that Christianity isn’t worth much, and that Christians are inconsistent with their own high standards. It is often the case that people whose lives have been harder and who are ‘lower on the character scale’ are more likely to recognize their need for God and turn to Christianity. So we should expect that many Christians’ lives would not compare well to those of the nonreligious (just as the health of people in the hospital is comparatively worse than people visiting museums).” — Timothy Keller, The Reason For God, pp. 53-54.

I would take this a step beyond Keller’s excellent observation and say that our growth in Christ is not only influenced by our background, but even by how we are hardwired, so to speak. Just ask any mother who has had more than one child. Some children are born with a bad temper. Others are not.

This is not to say that we should excuse bad behavior in the church or condone spiritual stagnancy.

It simply gives us a perspective that can enhance our patience with one another as we grow together in our walk with Jesus.

It should move us to pray with compassion for one another.